Exploring the Duality of Marriage and Family: Personal Choices or Divine Commands?

Is marriage and having children the be-all and end-all of life? Can one's worth or success as a person be measured solely by these lifecycle events? In today's world, where individuality and personal choice are highly valued, it's worth questioning the common assumptions surrounding marriage and family. Let's delve into the nuances of personal choices versus divine commands, and explore a viewpoint that challenges the notion of family being everything.

Personal Freedom vs. External Definitions

It's essential to recognize that anyone who allows others to decide their life choices and defines success or failure based on external criteria is empowering the world outside to dictate their path. This is akin to imprisoning oneself in a construct not of one's own making. The quest for fulfillment should be an internal journey, defined by an individual's unique path in life, rather than a societal norm.

Think of it this way: each person is unique, with a unique path laid out by the universe specifically for them. There is no one-size-fits-all formula for happiness and fulfillment. One should not constrict oneself to follow the herd (like sheep) or align with a narrow mindset (like wolves). Instead, one should embrace a broader perspective, much like the bear, which eats a variety of foods and knows when to socialize or stay in solitude.

Challenging the Narratives

Does everyone believe that getting married and having children is the only route to success and fulfillment in life? Contrary to popular belief, a non-scientific poll of a dozen people reveals that not a single person subscribes to this notion. The belief in the necessity of marriage and children as ultimate markers of success is not universal and should be questioned.

Moreover, some individuals are called to make other types of contributions to society, which does not necessarily involve having a family. Science, art, philosophy, and technological innovations can all be meaningful pursuits that do not require marriage or children to be successful or fulfilling. The idea that one's worth is entirely dependent on their marital status and the number of offspring they have is a limiting belief that one should challenge.

Divine Commands and Moral Authority

Considering the biblical commands to marry and have children as found in Genesis (2:24-25), many people argue that following these instructions is a moral obligation. However, it’s worth questioning whether God’s opinion is the only valid perspective in determining one's life choices. While God is indeed omniscient, omnipotent, and good, the doctrine of faith alone in Christ as the moral authority should not be absolute.

One can argue that God commands us to leave our parents, work hard, marry, and have children (Gen 2:24-25). These commands are meant to fulfill a specific part of His plan, but they do not encompass the entirety of human experience or worth. Faith in Christ is essential, but it should not be the sole determinant of one's personal choices and life path. God commands man to marry and have sex with a woman for life and to become one flesh, as well as to multiply and replenish the earth with children (Gen 1:28).

While violating these commands can be seen as sin and failure at life, the argument against them is not canceled simply because one believes in a higher power. It’s a complex interplay of divine guidance and human freedom. Ultimately, the decision to marry and have children should be based on personal beliefs, values, and life goals, not solely on divine commands.

In conclusion, the idea that marriage and family are the only benchmarks for a successful and fulfilling life is simplistic and limiting. Personal freedom, unique paths, and diverse life contributions should be celebrated. The choice to marry and have children is a personal one, and each individual should have the autonomy to make such decisions based on their own values and circumstances. Whether one adheres to the stipulations found in the Bible or not, the essence of one's worth and success should not be solely defined by these life choices.