Understanding and Enhancing Communication in Autistic Children: Tips for Parents and Caregivers
When will my 5-year-old level 2 autistic child start communicating? She knows lots of words, alphabets, numbers, and can sing rhymes pretty well. She also has lots of tantrums and other behavioral issues. These are common questions and concerns for parents of autistic children. Understanding the complexity of communication in autistic children is crucial for fostering a supportive and nurturing environment.
Be Careful What You Wish For!
Sometimes a second or subsequent Autistic child may not feel a need to speak because an older sibling does it for them. While each child's journey is unique, it's important to remember that all of our five Autistic children and 15 Autistic grandchildren started speaking in their own time. They are now articulate and confident speakers, just in their own ways.
Educating Ourselves and Our Children
I can answer that question. Having a 5-year-old with autism who is very talkative, verbal, and has excellent memory is a mix of joy and concern. Just a few months ago, I was wondering whether we would ever have a two-way conversation. The opposite scenario, where a child doesn't talk, presents a similar challenge.
Both situations arise from a common denominator: the child is nervous about keeping others interested. While one child might talk a lot because they want to talk and are anxious about it, the other feels the same but doesn't speak. Recognizing this and addressing it can make a significant difference in your child's communication journey.
Understanding the Autistic Mind
Firstly, it's crucial to remember that they are the way they are because their brains are wired that way. There is nothing personal about it. They love talking to us because they want to converse with us just as much as we want to converse with them. They crave our attention, approval, and love, even if they do not act like it. This proves that they care and want to know about us, even if they don't know how to express it.
Rewarding Good Behavior
One effective approach is to reward good behavior with frequent and heartfelt praise. This is particularly important for children with autism, as they often crave this approval. However, for the praise to be effective, it must be specific and motivating. For example:
"You just listened to what your daddy had to say. That's very kind of you. Look how happy he is knowing you could tell him his story."
A consistent praise system helps establish a positive feedback loop, encouraging children to continue exhibiting the desired behavior. It also boosts their self-esteem and confidence.
The Foundation of Building a Strong Parent-Child Relationship
Building a strong foundation is crucial for any parent-child relationship, especially in the context of autism. Spend 20 minutes of undivided attention each day playing with your child. This time helps you understand their needs, interests, and challenges. It also provides a chance to coach and train them effectively during this dedicated time.
Social Coaching and Emotional Regulation
Once you've established a solid foundation, it's time to move on to social coaching. Social coaching involves paying attention to your child and using every opportunity to teach them how to interact with others. Since my child is talkative, he often wants to talk to me, which presents numerous opportunities for coaching.
For example, when he interrupts his sister, I might say:
"C, you say 'gougou' and then let your sister finish. You know why? Because it's important to let others have their turn to talk. When you do this, it shows how respectful and considerate you are."
And when he does it right:
"You did it! Perfect! See how proud I am of you! You were a great listener."
Respecting Boundaries
Respecting boundaries is a crucial aspect of socialization. Teach your child about personal boundaries and model the behavior. For example, if your child says not to look into their room when they're getting dressed, respect that boundary. Explain the importance of these boundaries and why they are necessary.
By consistently modeling respectful behavior and teaching your child, you help them understand and respect the boundaries of others, which fosters better social interactions.
Consistency is Key
Consistent reminders and reinforcement are essential when working with children with autism. Praise them for every little thing they do correctly. This can be particularly effective as they can become quite adept at praising others, which helps them in social situations.
Practice social interactions through hand-on and pretend play. Even if your child isn't going to talk to anyone but you, make these interactions pleasant and engaging for both of you. This practice reinforces positive social behaviors and makes them more natural and effortless.
By following these strategies, parents can create a nurturing and supportive environment that encourages children with autism to communicate more effectively. Remember, every child's journey is unique, and patience, consistency, and understanding are key to fostering successful communication and social interactions.