The Fallout of a Week Without Coles and Woolworths
Lol. We lose our minds when supermarkets close for a day or two over Christmas and Easter. Shut them all down for a week and there’s be riots!
Media Outlets React with Horror
Media outlets worldwide react with horror at the Colesworths abrupt shock seven-day shutdown. Company spokespersons cite:
Image: Murdoch's Historic Day
Day One: Wesfarmers and Woolworths Limited shares tank, bringing on a massive correction across all sectors of the Australian Stock Exchange (ASX).
Image: Black Thursday, March 24, 2016. The Great Stock Market Crash
Day Two: The ASX crashes due to a collapse led by banking, transport, and logistics companies, plus the fuel and liquor distribution sectors, insurance, and superannuation-based entities. Temporary layoffs commence across a wide range of the Oz workforce.
Shock and Awe on the Trading Floor
Image: Shock and Awe on the Trading Floor as Market Caps Are Wiped Out
Day Three: Alan Jones mobilizes the public and outrage on talkback radio, announcing a meeting on the steps of Town Hall, Sydney. During the ensuing fracas, he is assassinated by a desperate and disenfranchised single father who ran out of disposable nappies. Hysteria and panic spread across six states and the Northern Territory.
First Mobilization of the Army in Darwin
Image: Alan Jones Speaks for the Final Time
Darwin witnesses the first mobilization of the Army. Queensland's Premier calls for a royal enquiry. The Victorian Premier announces statewide deployment of charity food, toilet, and baby product vans. The initiative immediately goes national, with New South Wales last.
Public Unrest Amplifies
Day Four: Over 100,000 employees of Coles unite with 190,000 employees of Woolworths leading public marches. Unions covering 42 industries, students, barefoot anarchists, pensioners, working families, and hangers-on participate in every capital city and country town center.
Government and Corporate Reactions
Day Five: A riot in Melbourne at which 360 are hospitalized, and an estimated 2000 people tear-gassed prompts the Prime Minister to appeal for calm and institute an 8:00 PM curfew. Army patrols:
Image: Melbourne Riots
Day Six: Aldi and IGA announce 14-hour trading and price cuts, though they are inferred hours outside the National Curfew. They also offer 0.10 per litre fuel discounts. Record shopping crowds:
Immediate Economic Impact
Day Seven: The Prime Minister recalls both Houses. Heated debate on a bill threatening nationalization of Wesfarmers and Woolworths Limited. The bill is rejected by crossbench senators. Cory Bernardi announces he has left the Liberal Party along with 30 members of the Far Right to register the Save Australian Food Emergency party (SAFE).
Long-Term Effects
Three weeks after reopening, the Australian economy shows marked negative growth, an official recession declared. Charles Packer and Rupert Murdoch are indicted for a series of suspicious short trades via proxies the week preceding the Great Colesworths Crash. Packer flees the country as Crown Casinos' shares bottom out. News Corp shares drop 11% before recovering after a rights issue. Woolworths announces it is fielding an offer from the unrelated South African corporation Woolworths Holdings Limited. Coles operates under the threat of a tripling in automatic robo-cashiers. The split in the Liberal Party results in a landslide vote against the party in a double dissolution election on July 2, 2016.
Political and Social Impact
The SAFE party polls poorly, with Bernardi announcing his retirement from Australian politics. Australia slowly returns to normal life.
Historical Impact and Legacy
Alan Jones is awarded an O.A.M. (Order of Australia Medal) posthumously. Labor 27 CEOs and 240 corporate upper management are indicted at a Royal Commission for their part in the Colesworths discombobulation. New South Wales and Queensland State governments do not lift the curfew for 18 months. Bondi Beach gradually regains its normal crowd the three weeks after the Colesworths disaster.
Colesworths' Aftermath
Colesworths announce aerial drone deliveries as their protection scheme to prevent such shutdowns from happening again. The overall impact of this event fosters a public need for continuity and security, as evidenced by the stringent measures taken by both governments and corporations.