The Duality of Lebanese Marriage: A First-Hand Account

Lebanon, a small yet culturally rich country, often garners attention for its unique social dynamics. One aspect that frequently needs discussion is the reality of Lebanese men in marriage today. This article delves into the experiences and perspectives of those who have lived through, or witnessed, family and marriage struggles in Lebanon. Through a first-hand account, we aim to highlight the duality that exists in Lebanese marriage and the evolving expectations within this cultural context.

The Image of Lebanese Men in Marriage

Lebanese men are often portrayed as some of the best husbands in the world. They are known for their fierce loyalty and protectiveness, and they take pride in providing for their families. This image is a result of the cultural and social values that prioritize family and tradition. In practice, however, it is a different story for many women and their experiences with marriage.

The Challenges Within Lebanese Marriage

Living in a marriage in Lebanon can be a traumatic experience for many women. The phrase "absolutely horrible" seems to resonate strongly with their narratives. One woman recounts a harrowing experience where her husband never worked, took advantage of her, and even stole from her. Moreover, she described a situation where her husband not only failed to communicate effectively but also resorted to physical violence and manipulation.

Violence and Abuse in marriage

The woman's experiences closely align with the statistics that show 80% of women in Lebanon have reported domestic violence. However, these experiences often remain hidden due to a pervasive culture of silence.

Physical violence: The frequency and severity of physical abuse often shock Westerners.Emotional manipulation: The imposition of strict control over the wife's Banning travel and confining the wife to the abuse: Using lies and constant yelling to keep the wife in a state of constant fear and confusion.

Cultural Constructs of Marriage

Within Lebanese culture, women are often perceived as subordinate to men. Despite the official family laws that may support gender equality, the cultural norms often perpetuate a system where women are seen as owned property.

Traditional values dictate that women should remain silent and submissive, which leaves them unable to voice their hardships or seek help. This systemic problem contributes to the rampant domestic violence anduserinfoir practices.

My Perspective as a Lebanese Man

Reflecting as a Lebanese man, I feel that it is our duty to maintain and uphold the traditional values that have been ingrained in our society. However, I also recognize that these values often clash with the reality of modern life. As a Catholic, my community places a high value on marriage as a one-time commitment. This commitment often leads to marriages that are financially and emotionally stable, which can be a win-win for both partners.

While the idea of a traditional and protective husband is appealing, it is important to acknowledge the evolving nature of societal expectations. Traditional values must be sustainable and not a facade. Women should be treated with respect and afforded equal rights.

Conclusion

Lebanese marriage is a complex panorama of traditional values and modern realities. Women often experience violence, abuse, and manipulation, while societal norms perpetuate a culture of silence and subjugation. This duality highlights the urgent need for cultural and legislative changes to ensure that all women in Lebanon can experience a fair and safe marriage. It is crucial for both men and women to engage in open conversations about these issues to foster a more supportive and equitable environment.