The Bizarre Perspective: Would You Rather Be Devoured Than Buried?

Are you serious about being eaten alive? I want to digest inside an animal and thought if we teamed up, we'd have a better chance of finding someone authoritative... Then I’d say all your worries are over.

First question: get eaten by what? Get eaten by carnivores like tigers, and you should be killed. Get eaten by a whale, according to the story of Jonah, and you won’t die. This is the first of the zero burial options that I can present to you.

Life after Death

Then we will see you on the other side when our time comes. You would also save your family a lot of cost since there would be no need for a cremation or burial. Isn’t this an invaluable offer?

Death and the Afterlife

Then you won’t be alive for long. Hopefully, you’ve already digested some spicy, peppery food so that you will be coughed right up. Otherwise, be grateful that you have helped nourish an unfortunate beast. Congratulate yourself for the important part you played in the food chain.

Alternative Ways of Dying

If by fungi or other parasites, you are facing a slow, miserable death. If you are eaten by rats, it would be a horribly slow process, ultimately leading to sepsis or blood loss. If you are ripped apart by dogs, you would probably be in shock before you bleed to death or have your throat torn out. Hungry dogs want the best part fast, so they may tear off your genitalia to more quickly get at the nutrient-rich internal organs. Your bones will be crushed, and the marrow eaten. Ultimately, you will pass through the digestive tract and become excrement.

If you are eaten by larger predators or sharks, your death will be equally horrible and your mortal residue the same. Alligators and wild hogs will kill you and let you rot before feasting on your remains. Even if you fall dead, you will be eaten by maggots and carrion birds. It is the cycle of life, eat and be eaten. Charming how things work.

Then I die. This bizarre and macabre perspective challenges the conventional funeral rites and burial practices. It invites us to reconsider the traditional end of life rituals and embrace a different perspective on existence and eventual decay. Life, as they say, is cyclical and bound to follow a natural course.

So, what are your thoughts on being devoured instead of buried? Would you dare to consider it as a more sustainable or meaningful way to end your life? As the cycle of life continues, our perspective on death and afterlife is constantly evolving, and perhaps it's time to ponder the unconventional.